Hmmm... where do I begin, it is a bit odd letting my mind wander knowing that my thoughts may be seen by someone other than myself. I suppose it is comforting though. The small chance someone may see a peek into your heart and see there own.
I have been so caught up lately in my aspirations that I have near forgotten to be grateful for what I have already achieved. It is a funny thing to be human, at times I feel it is a mean joke. But I think the funny part of it is, it is a joke we play on ourselves. It is our very nature to always look ahead to the next thing we can claim as our identity, but why does not seeing what's in front of you seem to go so hand in hand with this evolving nature. I feel that I have been so focused on what I want that I am making myself miserable. To see what I want and not what I have just reminds me that I am without. But why is it I feel like if I turn my focus away from my dreams " what is to come" they will fade. It feels as though I am in that place right before you wake up and you know you are having an amazing dream that you don't want to stop and in that realization the dream is already over. I don't know if that last sentence made sense to anyone but me. I am not quite sure it even made sense to me for that matter. I suppose that is how it is when you are trying to grasp at universal truths, they are so fleeting. Or not so much fleeting but I think a better way of describing it is " trying to explain God is like a fish trying to explain water"
I just saw a wonderful movie the note book It really reminded me to be grateful for what I have. And one thing I know I have is love. I am so blessed to know love that makes every cell of my body hummm with peace and joy. That is all there really is isn't it? Love? I think that is a new agreement I just made with myself, when ever I am feeling sorry for myself or wallowing in the "why not me" I am going to give some love to this world that loves me so deeply. It is amazing how the simplest act like complementing someones blouse or giving a sincere thank you to your waiter or cooking dinner for your lover not only fills your cup but allows it to over flow.
